The Cutter

" I like to wait- to see how things turn out.....
When you apply some pressure." - Maximo Park

The above cartoon is only 50% accurate.
The following story is about 88% percent true.
Yesterday, I stopped by my regular deli for my morning bagel and bottle of tea- pretty
much a routine for me before going to work. This deli is always packed with commute-dazed
New Yorkers and it's completely claustrophobic. You're either pushing or getting pushed.
I'm waiting in line with about 4 people behind me when this guy walks right up to the register.
Bypassing all of us and seemingly oblivious to common deli line etiquette.
I'm not a violent man.
I've mentioned previously that I dislike confrontation.
So what compelled me to walk up to this guy (6'1, 250 lbs, early 40's by my guessitmates) and tap him on the shoulder repeatedly until he turned around?
I HATE being cut in line. It's a damn social injustice that should never be tolerated.
"Dude- there's a line."
"So?"
"SO?" (.....Slow Burn)
"So you're a dick, dude."
"Fuck you, jerkoff."
Now, I've heard a comedian named Dane Cook mention that once an
altercation enters the "Fuck You" stage, there's nothing you can say
to beat that. And it's true...it's just a matter of volume after that.
"FUCK ME?" and at this point I take a step towards him...
"Fuck YOU man!"
and at that point he was completely done with his transaction and
the guys behind the counter were hollering at both of us and I realized
that the whole place dropped a few decibels....then I kinda checked myself
and realized the situation wasn't worth all the fuss and turned my back on
the jackass and paid for my breakfast.
And lived to draw another day.
Anyways, The above sketch is my therapeutic graphic handling of the scene with
FrogDaddy dispensing his virtual justice.
I'm not a violent man.
I just play one in cartoons.
Ribbit!

FrogDaddy